And life goes pretty much back to normal. The moments between consciousness and darkness, between narcotic and pain, the taste of castor oil, which is probably the worst in the world, would, let's hope, stay forever solely in memory.

I could hear every now and then a SMS ring. My elbow felt soar and painful and I spoke of protest but only murmurs could be heard. Families came and left and talked about how my face went swollen. Nurses rushed in and out and talked about how low my blood pressure was. Then I heard Z's voice and struggled to reach for her hand. Great to know she was there for me the whole time.

But other than those mentioned above, my brain seemed to be shut down for most of the time. It wasn't even like in sleep bbecause in sleep I dream all the time and a whole night would be full. But it was just blank.

It was until midnight before I could read the SMS, but still couldn't keep my eyes open long enough to reply any. Thank you everyone for your care. I couldn't be more grateful.

It's wonderful to have your family and friends' support, but in such things as a surgery, you are more than alone and alone you fight, against yourself.